Herbie Goes Bananas

Herbie Goes Bananas (1980) *** 93 min, G. *** 93 min, G.

Starring Harvey Korman, Charles Martin Smith, Cloris Leachman, Stephan Burns, John Vernon. Directed by Vincent McEveety. Last of the Love Bug films finds Herbie, the Volkswagen with a soul, entered in a Brazilian race. Mild-mannered, empty-headed wackiness abounds. Strictly for youngsters.

Halliwell’s Film Guide was less generous, saying:

Two Americans take their magical Volkswagen on a South American holiday. Listless addition to a series which has already gone on too long.

The director, Vincent McEveety, also directed the previous film, Herbie Goes To Monte Carlo, but I can’t detect anyone else who had been there before. Certainly the writer Don Tait had not written a Herbie movie before. Bill Walsh was the only writer to do two of them, and he did the first two.

Herbie Goes Bananas opened in Sydney on Thursday 18th December 1980, at only one cinema - the Village Blacktown complex on Kildare Rd. The session times were 9:30, 12:30, 3:30 and 7:30 daily except weekends when there was no 9:30 session. This was only the week after John Lennon was shot, so that might help you realise how long ago it seems!

Surprisingly Herbie Goes Bananas did not start at any screens in the city. Instead, the big chains preferred big blockbusters that summer. For example, at the Hoyts Centre you could have seen The Empire Strikes Back, Blue Lagoon, The Dogs Of War, Hopscotch, The Rocky Horror Show (it’s STILL playing!) and Fatty Finn, starring Bert Newton, Gerard Kennedy, Noni Hazelhurst and Lorraine Bayley (remember it?)

At the Village Centre there was The Shining, Superman II, Breaker Morant and Battle Beyond The Stars. Life of Brian would start soon!

Herbie Goes Bananas therefore caused barely a ripple in the cinema scene. There was absolutely no preview written in the newspapers of the time, and there were no ads for it in the paper either except for the usual display feature for the movie centre itself.

The next Thursday was Christmas Day, but on Boxing Day (Fri 26th) Herbie Goes Bananas also began at Village Parramatta and at the Roselands cinema, sharing with Any Which Way You Can and Hopscotch respectively. Thus you had a choice of only three screens in all of Sydney to see it - no city screens, no other suburban theatres and. most surprisingly, no drive-in screens either! I think this shows how poorly the film was received better than anything I could say.

On 15th January Herbie was removed from Roselands and Blacktown, and remained only at Parramatta. Remember this was the middle of the summer school holidays! Herbie finished up at Parramatta on 29th January, and that was that. Incidentally, the infamous underarm bowling incident occurred three days later at the MCG, between Australia and New Zealand, which should bring the memories flooding back.

This research surprised me, as I’m sure I remember seeing Herbie Goes Bananas in the city. However, I could find no mention of it in the papers of the time, so perhaps my memory is faulty! I do remember thinking what a crappy, disappointing film it was.

We meet the two daggy main characters, Pete and D.J, both in 70’s body shirts and flared pants. They’re down in Mexico to pick up an ex-race car left to Pete by his uncle, Jim Douglas. There’s the slim connection with previous films. The race car has a ‘cracked block’ (is that all?) We also meet the shitty little kid, Paco, who hijacks the film and causes no end of annoyance.

At the garage, as a worker crosses the screen with a rear ‘63 bumper, we see Herbie in the background. He looks in excellent condition and just as he did in previous films, down to the funny headreast seats used in Herbie Goes To Monte Carlo. The details are correct - off-white or pale-grey ‘63 US-spec sunroof VW, with the red, white and blue stripes and white/black Disney ‘53’ decals on bonnets and doors. Even the California OFP-857 plates are correct .

Pete’s comedy relief sidekick, D.J. (we never learn what this stands for), refers to Herbie having won the ‘Monte Carlo Grand Prix’ (!) Not correct. That’s a Formula 1 race of course, and I think Nikki Lauda won it in ‘77. In the previous film Herbie actually won the Trans France Race, from Paris to Monte Carlo.

Looking closely at Herbie, see his wipers don’t sit on the glass, but on the bodywork. No VW badge on the bonnet as usual. Note the white 5-door Golf in the background.

The garage owner explains that Herbie could have won the ‘Baja’ as well, but Jim Douglas’ girlfriend’s car "didn’t make the curve. Herbie stopped...didn’t finish. Jim said, ‘It’s here.’" Firstly this is an incorrect retelling of the previous movie, where Herbie DID finish. And in any case, why would Jim flip out and abandon Herbie in the middle of Mexico, after all Herbie’s done for him? Surely not.

Herbie has a stock motor and gearbox, judging from the sound as they depart. Note the Kombi pass by, then later the red Mexican 1200 Beetle in the street with the indicators in the bumper, just like the last German VWs.

Note also the Type 181 ‘Thing’ drive past - 5-bolt wheels with ‘elephant’s foot’ taillights. Watch when the Kombi drives past - you can see the reflection of the square Disney studio lights in its paintwork. I hate this little kid already - I want to beat him to a pulp.

The squeak of an unoiled VW door alerts the snotty kid. Herbie has no heater boxes. When the kid sneaks around Herbie’s nose he’s an earlier model - see how the pre-‘63 Wolfsburg Crest has been removed from the bonnet.

The Police drive VW 181s, in both white and blue. Herbie has stock wheels in one scene. Why does Herbie swivel his lights to follow the shitty little kid, and why get involved with him? Not Herbie’s insides are painted darker grey when the policeman opens the door.

Herbie opens his bonnet, and we see no spare tyre, but a large blue cloth covering everything. The kid jumps into what seems to be a gutted 1500 Beetle front (judging from bonnet shape) with no fuel tank and a flat, carpeted tray.

The wheelie car is the old counterweight special - see it slam down hard. Spot the deep sump fitted underneath Herbie as he comes up the hill.

Eventually he’s lifted onto the ship Sun Princess (shades of Love Boat here), where DG calls out that he’s going to win the ‘Grand Premio of Brazil’. The prospect of seeing this is the only thing keeping me going now!

The kid opens the bonnet from inside (how?) and you can see the gutted front with no fuel tank. The front license plate is a fake as it’s just painted, not a stamped, 3D-style affair.

We’ll skip over the romantic fluff on-board ship, except to note that Cloris Leachman plays Aunt Louise, and Harvey Korman played the funnily named Captain Blythe. These two stars later went on to bigger and better things in Mel Brooks’ classic History of the World Part 1 ("Piss boy! Don’t get saucy with me, Bernaise!)

The deck hand has dinner in the cargo hold amongst the freight - what’s wrong with the staff dining room? Herbie moves forward - on real ships cars are lashed or fixed so they can’t move. See how roomy the ship’s hold is - it would actually be tightly packed with cargo but that would spoil the story for when Herbie breaks loose (as he does shortly).

When the lads are interrogated by the Captain, note the marvellous painting on the wall behind him. It shows the British clipper ships Ariel and Taeping racing for London during the closest clipper contest ever, the Great Tea Race of 1866. This Captain has style!

So to the dress party. DG wears his orange mechanics overalls with a big Goodyear label on the back, while Pete wears a shiny silver racing suit that looks like it escaped from the set of Lost in Space, circa. 1966! He also advertises Goodyear - wonder how much they paid for that?

Now comes the most distressing scene of the entire Love Bug movie series, as Herbie is made to walk the plank. Mounted upside down on a ramp at the ship’s edge, the rear wheels both turning backwards, horn bleating pathetically, he slides slowly off and down into the sea with a splash. The car is a stripped one with a grimy 40hp engine and gearbox and no interior or rear license plate, but it’s still a horrid thing to watch. Herbie sinks beneath the ship’s wake, upside down in the wash, in a matter of seconds thanks to the side windows being open. A disgraceful waste of a real VW.

The little kid blubs and no doubt we’re expected to feel sorry for him. Well I don’t - it’s his fault Herbie met a watery end in the Pacific Ocean, the little bastard! He even escapes being locked up by the police in Panama.

Herbie reappears in the Panama Canal locks, a bedraggled sight floating tail down. He keeps going, miraculously to the same inlet where the kid is fishing. This car must be attached underwater somehow, as the bonnet opens and closes as the car breaches and sinks a few times.

After being dragged ashore, on one side, full of salt water, mud and weed, Herbie collapses in the front . Watch the smoke, soot and water fly out when he struggles to restart! If his cylinders were actually full of water the engine could not be turned over - it would be ‘hydraulically locked’. The spark plugs must be removed and water expelled first, then the bloody oil changed!

None of that for Herbie. By the time he drives back into Panama City amid all the saccharine music he’s as right as rain, having run himself back into tune (don’t try this yourself at home).

The movie goes downhill fast from here. Herbie looks awful with dense mudstains (painted on by Disney, not real mud) and Taxi scrawled in red over that. See the rear bumper vibrate loose on takeoff! When the Captain and Aunt Louise share the backseat (did the kid wash the ocean out of it?) note there’s no headlining.

So to the bullring scene, Disney’s technical triumph of this film we’re told. The studio car has big windows, but the exterior car doesn’t. The dashboard seems pale green, and has a radio, glovebox lid trim strip and this time a fuel gauge (missing in earlier films). There are many hydraulic and compressed air tricks here, but watch the bull ram the VW once or twice - Bam! See it crunch the left front, which is somehow straight again next scene, and shove the VW around. Watch the big-window car appear again. Suddenly there’s another dashboard shot - a different car because the radio and trip strip are suddenly missing.

The ‘caster wheel’ is pretty good, as all four wheels turn and the car spins in its own length. Another hydraulic Herbie drops the nose and raises the tail in impressive style. Lots of work gone on there - pity about the stupid story.

Notice Herbie has stripes over his rear cooling slots. This is consistent with the previous two films where Herbie also had stripes painted there, but in the original film (the Love Bug), he didn't. As he drives along, note the rust bubbles in the chrome vent window post. Poor Herbie! The bus finally blowing up is very well done.

Herbie is finally reunited with the adults. I love the Captain’s line as Aunt Louise tries to talk to Herbie..."where’s the boy?" beep beep.. "It’s a car, woman, not Lassie!"

There follow several comments about how squashy it is for five adults in the VW - all I can say is there’s more room than in a New Beetle!

The kid comes aboard too, as well as the Inca gold thing that looks like a manhole cover. A solid gold item that big - 60cm diameter, 5cm thick, would weigh 273kg (gold is nearly twice as dense as lead) which is 9,650 ounces!

Herbie chases the Cessna 182, and by using his front bonnet and levitating front end he grabs the tail, bending the fuselage like a banana (boom boom!) Further hydraulic chomping and the tail falls off. See how smashed in Herbie’s front bonnet is! The plane continues to fall apart before finally coming to a halt, with Herbie looking a complete mess. Have a good look, because that’s the last time you’ll see him on the big screen as the correct model.

So to the concluding scenes. Harvey Korman’s Mel Brooks-style of humour comes out when he says, "Any man of the sea who wouldn’t want her rolling under him is ready for dry dock!", not referring to Aunt Louise (aww), but rather the square-rigged barque sailing by the cabin window.

The last scene shows Herbie nicely restored (finally) in the ship’s stateroom. But he’s a ‘65 with big windows! Oh no, finishing with a mistake! And how did they get a car into a ship’s cabin? And why start the engine? Kids aren’t permitted to drive race cars! Too many errors.

That’s the end of the Herbie series. Hope you’ve enjoyed them! Roll the credits now...

"Herbie replicar owned by Greg Carr, of Buffalo, NY. Thanks for your help with this series, Greg"